Every person experiences grief differently and painful events have the potential to impact your life in a variety of ways. It is normal to experience a range of emotions after suffering a significant loss, and you can expect to feel powerful sorrow for a time.
If, however, your grief impacts you so significantly that you lose the ability to focus or function, it can be difficult to go on. When the sadness simply won’t go away, knowing where to turn can make all the difference. Read below to discover more about grief, grief counseling, and the ways it can help heal a broken heart.
What is grief? How do I separate grief from the everyday sadness I sometimes feel?
Although all sadness can be felt in varying degrees, grief is typically defined as deep, sharp sorrow or distress. While it is most commonly associated with death, grief can accompany loss of any type—an unforeseen illness, a sudden breakup, moving away from home, or being laid off from a job.
Sadness differs from grief in several ways: First, sadness is a more temporary state. Typical bouts of sadness last only hours or days, whereas grief has a tendency to last much longer. Second, feelings of sadness can be caused by minor incidents, or even “nothing” at all. Grief is the direct result of a trauma or loss and the feelings associated with your grief will reflect the severity of your loss.
Grief can also be the result of a seemingly positive life event. Graduating from school, changing jobs, moving to a new place, ending a toxic relationship, or retiring can all lead to the need to grieve. Grief is a natural, essential part of coping with change and is nothing to feel ashamed or embarrassed about.
What is grief counseling? How can grief counseling benefit me if I have been suffering for a prolonged period of time?
If your grief gives you no reprieve, you may feel exhausted and overwhelmed at the end of each day. Grief is a heavy burden to carry, and carrying it alone can leave you damaged and unable to cope. If your sorrows have taken hold, grief counseling is available to help you learn to manage your pain and move on with your life.
As a specific branch of psychotherapy, grief counseling seeks to teach individuals how to handle their loss and cope in a healthy manner. Grief counseling is similar in approach to typical, unspecialized therapy, and grief counselors will likely suggest you participate in both private and group therapy sessions. While grief counseling cannot eliminate your pain entirely, the structure it provides will help you develop healthy coping skills and learn ways to manage your overwhelming emotions.
While many grief counselors structure their treatment programs to address physical loss and death, therapy sessions can be customized to meet the needs of various types of emotional pain. Just as the grieving process will be unique to each individual, different losses will trigger grief in different people. Even if the grief you feel is not due to “standard” reasons, your grief counseling team will work with you to develop a strategy to best meet your needs. No matter the circumstances surrounding your grief, hope and healing can be found over time.
While it is very possible to overcome grief with a simple combination of patience and time, many people find themselves unable to move forward without additional guidance. Grief counseling provides support, structure, and resources that may otherwise be unavailable to you during this difficult time. If your sadness seems to be staying for good, consider the benefits grief counseling can provide—and begin to pick up the pieces of your life.
About the author
Janet Traylor earned both her MA in Clinical Mental Health Counseling and BS in Psychology from Regent University. She graduated cum laude from her undergraduate program and was later awarded an Academic Merit Scholarship for graduate study. She is trained in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and has utilized sand tray therapy, expressive art therapy, play therapy and equine therapy. She’s a member of several professional organizations, including the California Board of Behavioral Sciences, California Association for Marriage and Family Therapists and the California Association for Licensed Professional Clinical Counselors. She currently works in a group practice at Caldwell-Clark in San Diego. For more information call (858) 255-0089.